Funny Christmas Quotes

Welcome to Funny Christmas Quotes. If you are a Crafter/ Individual you are free to use these Christmas quotes without asking permissionThis page brings you the best short cute funny wishes, quotes, messages, wordings, sayings, text and greetings for and to family and friends suitable for greetings cards and scrapbooking pages






People really act weird at Christmas time! What other time of year do you sit in front of a dead tree in the living room and eat nuts and sweets out of your socks?

On Donner, On Blitzen, On VISA!

Enjoy the holly days!Humbugs Beware! Christmas cheer is contagious!

You can tell a lot about a man by the way he handles three things... a rainy day, an ill loved one and tangled Christmas tree lights.

You don't need Visa when you've got Santa! You don't need Santa when you've got Visa! Who needs Santa when you've got Grandma!

If you got everything you wanted for Christmas where would you put it?

Winter is the season to be sneezin'.

Funny Christmas Quotes

Christmas is the season when you buy next year's gifts with this year's money.

He knows if you've been good or bad. Hope you have a Merry Christmas anyway

Be on the lookout for jolly, old, fat, white-bearded men bearing gifts.

One good thing about Christmas shopping... it toughens you up for the January sales.

Watch where you step. Watch where you go. You may end up under the mistletoe.

Be jolly, by golly.

If ifs, ands and buts were sweets and nuts, we'd all have a wonderful Christmas.

Christmas calories don't count!

Christmas is a race to see which gives out first... your money or your feet.

Funny Christmas Quotes

Have a Berry Merry Christmas under the mistletoe.

Is it too late to be good?

This year celebrate a traditional (British, American etc) Christmas... with the tree from Norway, the ornaments from China, the lights from Japan, and the idea from Bethlehem.

Believe in Santa and charge cards!

Believe in Santa. . . just beclause!

The closer to Christmas, the gooder kids get.

Every year you're bound to hear some youngster say "I wish that Christmas would last all year." What they don't know is that it does. Wait 'til they grow up and have to pay off the credit cards.

Christmas is a claus for celebration.

May you hear those three little words at Christmas: No Assembly Required!

When riding on a toboggan, watch out for your old noggin'.

Funny Christmas Quotes

Christmas is the time of year when you realize how many people you know and how many sizes you don't.

When you stop believing is when you start getting underwear for Christmas.

Christmas is the season of peace and goodwill till you go shopping and get the bill.

Merry Kissmas with lots of hugs.

The big man is coming and already I'm shedding a tear. I'm just too santamentalMeowy Christ-mouse!

Be naughty and save Santa a trip.

Santa Claws never forgets the cat.

Santa Paws never forgets the dog.

Crowded holiday shopping can cause clausetrophobia.

Isn't it a shame Christmas comes at the time of year when the stores are so crowded?

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Funny Christmas Quotes